On occasion, a student may start 'getting in trouble' at school post IM. Why is this? You would expect just the opposite. This usually has a lot to do with the child feeling more empowered, less willing to accept being bullied, or more confident, all positive mental gains. But the children do not know how to behave more empowered, deal appropriately with bullies, or be assertive in a positive way. Therefore their behavior may be seen as aggressive, fighting for a new position in the class rank, standing up for themselves, but inappropriately so. This is the time to re-teach assertiveness skills. These are positive negative responses to IM.
Dr. Neubrander is an autism specialist with a very involved parent questionnaire. He very eloquently explains the same positive negative responses that I see with IM. As I couldn't see how I could say it more concisely, I just cut and pasted some of his relevant comments here.
Increased awareness is very frequently the primary underlying reason for the majority of the positive negative responses parents may see. Once a child becomes more aware, s/he feels more in control which manifests itself by having stronger opinions about life, greater self assertiveness, self assuredness, self confidence, and much more independence.
Very frequently increased independence is one of the primary reasons for the majority of the positive negative responses. It is usually associated with increased awareness, more personal opinions, a greater self assuredness, self reliance, self assertiveness, and self confidence
“Inappropriately appropriate aggression” is seen frequently and most often is a manifestation of a positive negative response due to greater awareness of his/her own wants and needs, stronger opinions, greater self awareness, more self assertiveness, and independence.
Behavior frequently becomes worse for a period of time until “social appropriateness” is learned. This change of behavior is most often due to positive negative responses that are secondary to stronger opinions, greater self awareness, more self assertiveness, greater self confidence, and much more independence.
Frequently a child may actually become much more irritable rather than less irritable. When this happens it is usually a positive negative response because the child now is less tolerant of others who do not make his/her life more pleasant or more comfortable on his/her unrealistic time schedule because s/he has stronger opinions, greater self awareness, more self assertiveness, greater self confidence, and much more independence, and wants what s/he wants now, not later, done his/her way, not your way, and because s/he isn’t getting it as hoped for expresses his/her disgust as irritability. Because the child now has stronger opinions, greater self awareness, more self assertiveness, greater self confidence, and much more independence, it becomes even more frustrating when s/he cannot get his/her way or have you understand what s/he wants you to understand or do.
Inappropriate aggression is infrequent but when present it is a negative negative response. Unlike “inappropriately appropriate” aggression which is a frequent finding, when a child is aggressive more often for no apparent reason, then the most likely reason is that the child does not feel well for some reason that s/he cannot explain. Finding the cause may be difficult but must be taken seriously.
At times a previously cooperative child may become less cooperative because the child now wants more control of his/her life, and possibly for the first time consciously realizes his/her newly acquired power to control to some extent personal situations. Such responses are typically secondary to now having stronger opinions, greater self awareness, more self assertiveness, greater self confidence, and much more independence
At times a child becomes less flexible instead of more flexible. When this happens it is usually a positive negative response because the child now wants more control of his/her life and realizes more his/her newly acquired power to control to some extent personal situations. Such responses are typically secondary to now having stronger opinions, greater self awareness, more self assertiveness, greater self confidence, and much more independence.
